WISH i could be all of me without all the fights
and wouldn’t it be something so new
i’m so deeply affected // infected by love
and so I write ‘i feel i have no right’
taking all the blame then joking i knew
it’s how the merry goes round and I throw up
from this dizzy life and oh what fun
scary, scary times in the sun
guess i’m so easily amused
kissing the circus clown and hugging
all the carnies of this life beneath the big
top tent wishing I was so like you and salt
within the wound of my eyes and in my
heart so I know life is kaleidoscope
and in the sun in the wind I scream:
‘Scary! Scary!’
and so i dance with the dancing bear
and watch the clown on the high wire
and balloons kissing the big tent skies
we are all we are and all we know
so hello hello hell no on well it’s so

:: 07-28-2015 ::

VIOLINE I: Oh lovely life oh my love Oh love i say i adore you

violin ii: tears weep my mouth in all i feel seeing you

Viola: if love is God then i have met Him in Glory

Violoncello und Kontraba:

my dear, i am honored to be here with you now

the seasons were long and suns came up and

then silently went beneath my wishes

oh, i saw you in the sparrow and the green
tallest grasses my sweetest love
and now together!

:: 07-25-2015 ::

and Spring(tide
pulls are gentle
tugs upon hearts)
no.ne_I>LOVEme
and did ->who
knew one ever
(knew the sound
of an ocean in
a kept shell)
i envy sand
that someTHING
takes it away!
but not love
in my own life!
So, the song of
waves my keeper;
keeps me alive
and you — lost
at sea.
the flotsam vomit
jetsam blood!

:: 07-25-2015 ::

i kissed the life of my heart
knowing someday i’ll walk up
toward the stairs to a place
where i can see everything
and i have no regrets
i walked across a path of fire
laughing but my tears put them out
and i was no one to be sure and
even not what you knew.
In a tree by a river where we
kissed there is a nightingale
that sings “do we really know,
do we really wonder” i am one
of those voices who stand lonely
and do you really know // i wonder
oh, do you really know — i wonder
And i gave all of my soul to the
Queen but the Knight and Brook
took away the board of my life
and the council of 12 laughed
so i really wonder

:: 07-25-2015 ::

FEAR becomes my river
it flows into me
as the tides pull
my spirit away;
it is mine forevermore,
and i’ll never let it go

i kissed the mask
of a familiar thought
that worships hearts
all the hope so heaven-high,
like me, so unfulfilled in you.

and i say, “i am the river
of gold where hopes and fear die–
and you reach out your slender hand
but i cannot slay your demons
so they remain just for you to kill

and what i am is not what you wish
and what you need is a sweet friend
who can never go away in the end
i am the white knuckled one
who has lost everything — there’s
no more for me to give

a voice by bamboo stilts, and stains
by time, as small people, without
dislike or suspicion

and everyone i know is a ghost
i gave my heart to the dead
her name, Emily E. Dickinson
how can i ever let her down
since she knows more
across the other-side

:: 07-25-2015 ::

if i should ever use famous
words or expressions
i wish you to give me
LIPS of dying wishes
(i really unlike hating
would-be poets and politicians
and religious perverts —
give me a lemmon in my drink
of water: i soon forget them
all. But .please. tell me
something new in abstractly
spoken feeling || i wish to
believe you are alive.
everyONE i have known that
excited my mind is NOWdead
–>are<— you?

:: 07-24-2015 ::

AND if, by one step
who knows the sun’s
heart?
a kiss,golden(glimmering)
city touching skin
at day
(and why should you
or i try?
i was into “it”,if i
should say: love is full
of pretty people –a ballon,
if we’d tried! going upper
to meet sailing knees
which (i had hoped) no others
ever visited,where
always
air
Breathed)) and Souls
believe in living Spirits
even if not picked by thee!
nothing to express but
THIS!

:: 07-24-2015 ::

i live inside a child’s heart
a broken toy like blue monday
manufactured reject and i
smile with chocolate all across
myFACE. i have no feelings
they left when the wages
became too low for me to live
and most feelings — it’s the
way strong souls live yeah
it’s something in the way
yeah, we survive.
i sprung a leak and Moses
says the ark left and i must
swim but i’m okay cause i have
no feelings left and the fish
swim the same way without feelings
oooh yeah, it’s something like me
yeah, me. it’s the way i see you
and the world: i love colors
but hate the flesh and the way
it needs my meat but not my heart
so i sprung a leak and Moses knows
FEMA comes with guns to make things
right and the fish look at me —
they have no feelings like me
so i’m a blue monday manufactured
reject

:: 07-23-2015 ::

WHEN if-THEN i find
emptiness
alone is this
domain: visits me
whose grand name
is without words —
that delves me
like the moan
of a kitten
wishing mice
or a universe
thirsting to
reclaim my own:
i know their coming,
by couriers and
uninvited whims:
who delivered me
unto flesh and
now take the flame
they claimed —
BUT I ROAR
i am no life to
take but yours
i keep inside of me!

:: 07-21-2015 ::

SOMETIMES and mostly many times
we are dead.  i wished alive but
mostly the heavy head in the
thickest mud and dried ground
by ages of beaten fists of time.
We were all babies once so pure,
clean, and unblemished…
the most of humans were this
but some still are!
too few, too late.
? i am not sure of this
and still stirs within me
a hope brighter than the sun
— when it comes (i do believe)
all things will change.
And the name?  The Name IS
and ALWAYS WAS!

:: 07-21-2015 ::