I’D give up heaven to be close to you / but sooner
or later fate decides \
How i never wish the world to see my heart’s so broken
INside my Heart a forever rain
that never seems to dry
so every moment of truth & lies
can never understand but understand
i wanna know when i fell down the rampart of
horror’s unknown )inside + out( to strive
hard my angel wings so bruised from this day
Who i am
Who i am
is the
No One
within
Life.
:: 11.01.2022 ::
[Cosmos] Does the idea of death afflict you? Does it, coward?
[Humanity] No-no it does not!
[Cosmos] This prospect is inevitability.
And watch: all the skies are chrysanthemums
and the stars are little fish . Dreaming wishing
to awaken you wished to die many times over, but now
it is no matter — all violent are skies of your
heart turned red to purple.
[Humanity] To die requires more than living.
[Cosmos] Then begin at the beginning and release the colors
of your art. It is the beginning!
The weaker artist will say and ask:
“That’s why I asked you, because you are the only person I can ask
without scaring you away. If you can do it, I will give you all
the money I have and say I will do it myself.”
[Cosmos] Then you shall never create but reproduce.
[Humanity] This thing must be arrested; that is why I am asking you.
–silence–
:: 10.29.2022 ::
My bonnie lass | My bonnie lass
I called to you I cried
I ran I wailed
I crossed the blue blood
The desolate sand___
I lay you on the dry grass
I laid you here in these windswept woods
in this desolate wood my love
My beautiful lass You don’t like me
You don’t want me I can hear your voice.
No, that’s wrong.
I see you You’re gone You’re in my arms
You’re gone Your body’s broken
Your breasts drenched In my sweat
You were never mine Never mine
Your face is pale You’re still wet
You’re still naked Your bones exposed
But your drenched flesh I cannot forget
The tears
Your voice
I don’t care
You’re a blossom
A bloom
A flower
And I see you
I see you as the crabs fight over your flesh
Nothing remaining of your plump breasts
And that is how i like you
My flower.
:: 10.13.2022 ::
What you pet is an animal in a cage
but the little child could not stop__
see the animal in your cage you pet?
\snap/ Because her mind had gone (out for a stroll)
and fallen down the Rabbit Hole she became a Beast.
Destroying all her
Reflections of what she
wished to be _ but sight inside a crack she feared became focused. All of the World just creations of Your Own _ devils and demon
dogs and God and Satan and Jesus
and Buddah is the illusion we mainly
believe and choose.
Excited we begin to create more
and everything is right where it belongs
: fog of confusion to open the door
to the horror of our own destiny.
:: 10.12.2022 ::
OUR minds are concocted by Machines
those who control space and time/
the incredible magicians of old age
and our government is corrupt
We are trapped in the belly of
the monster called civilization
and the machine is bleeding to death.
Our time has now come to pass.
And we are to see reality.
The many millions of suicides
are now beginning /out of sight\
our animal tendency is one that requires
a sense of humanity. But the many
screams are carried by a dark wind
that blows : there is no government
but the radio is on. We are bleeding
to death and the sun has fallen down
and the billboards are unlit.
It was a moment when the buildings
fell down while mother’s clutched their
babies and fathers fought the faceless
enemies of evils spirits.
The world had forgotten.
There is a devil.
And he is worst than men.
:: 09.18.2022 ::
Left life ? then again
in a shadow i dreamed
i touched your hair
Inside a castle
Once a knight i dreamed
then cancelled all flight
staying here for you statue
Summer dream deep inside
solid winter mud i stayed
listening to the creep
of time ten thousand fold
only to dig out upon
the land ~~~ Gorgo! Is one
name but call me Medusa :
within living venomous snakes in place
of hair. Turn to stone turn to stone
if I have no love for you
| you wish upon that star — why is
it you never cared? ~~~ you turn
(in universal mind) to stone____
never tell me what to do!
:: 09.08.2022 ::
An Afternoon upon a pained wooden foot
walking to my home inside a monster
who hurts hearts / a child grown \
who waits for me there like a storm
i went into the front door
he sent me to a place i never knew
the skies were bleeding blood
~~ she left me alone to deal with
our youngest child | i forgot how
love felt when i became devoured
by horror
I now wander alone.
In your eyes do you see love?
I honestly believe you died years
ago inside your own storm and
never asked for help from me.
Crushed me. With things you did.
Not what I did to you. Watching
me die and how you must have smiled.
Hating your choices but never mine.
But I still breath.
:: 07.11.2022 ::
Jason had this penthouse apartment that was centrally located in Beverly Hills.
He was incredibly clean, but in an overwhelming kind of way.
The carpet and stuff were spotless, the cabinets were plastic, and the paint was not chipping. I felt like I was in a Doctor’s office waiting room.
He was snoring loudly, and just at the right moment he opened his eyes.
“Ha! You are dead! This is a dream, right?”
I felt a bit offended, as I was obviously the one snoring.
“No, no!” He pointed at the clock. “It’s 4AM!” (Lucky number 8!).
“You’re a zombie! You’re dead and you’re dreaming!”
“I’m a zombie, alright!” I yawned and started to hack up zombie gore.
“Watch out!” He screamed and jumped out of the bed.
“All right, you monster! I’m dead and I’m dreaming! I’m dead and I’m dreaming!”
He chased me around the room.
“You’re not dead, you’re a zombie! You’re a zombie, that’s just what you are, a zombie, so it’s a dream!” He threw up his hands. “You can’t win!”
“I can’t win, yeah? That’s right, I can’t win. That’s my luck, ha-ha!”
I hope you like midnight horror flicks.” His face crinkled with confusion; the zombies smile that I was always afraid of flashing on.
“Well I didn’t say I was a horror movie person. Oh, that’s right, but you said, I’m dead and I’m dreaming, so that’s a horror movie, right?”
I thought about it.
“Okay, I guess it’s more like…like if a zombie comes to my door…”
“…and it’s not a horror movie?”
“Yeah. It’s just a regular knock at my door.”
“OK, I guess it is a horror movie.”
“Yup.”
“So are you telling me, I’m dreaming?”
“I’m telling you, it’s just a regular knock at your door.”
He hugged me and ran away from the door.
“Oh, no! Zombies are at the door, oh no!”
I joined him and kept chasing the zombie until Jason growled in my ear, “Cristina, I’m the last of my family! I have to protect my kingdom! This is my job! You, you are not my wife! That’s over and done! All that you are, is a woman! You are not a child! I don’t know where you come from, but I’m not marrying you!
I don’t know who you are!”
“Jason, you can’t be an emperor! You’re a zombie, not an emperor. You’re dead and you’re dreaming! This is a dream! Wake up!”
“This is not a dream, this is real life. And you’re not my wife! You’re just a woman!”
“Are you threatening to kill me? If you do I am going to-“
“Cristina, you’re not my wife!”
“No! Stop it, stop it!” I ran back to the bed and crawled under the covers. Jason stood in the doorway of the bedroom with his back to the door, and looked down at me. He was clenching his fists.
“Don’t you dare.”
His back was turned to me, but I could hear him as I lay there.
“If I did, what would happen to you?”
“I don’t know.”
“You would be in the woods. You would be alone, never to find another person.”
“Maybe.”
“No, you wouldn’t be alone. You would have someone.”
“No.”
“Don’t you want someone, Cristina?”
“I’m not a zombie! I can’t just turn into a zombie! You know, don’t you, that a zombie’s life is like a terrible TV soap opera? We’re all dead and we have to live through some very horrible circumstances in order to get back to our old life. That’s what a zombie is.”
“That’s not you, that’s just a movie! You are a real person. And you’re very scared.”
“No, I’m not.”
“Of zombies? Of living alone, of the world going to hell in a hand basket? Of waking up dead and never having a normal day, ever? Of living in a world of nasty zombies?”
“Yes.”
“No you’re not. You’re scared. You’re a person, and you’re scared. You have nothing to be scared of.”
“But you have plenty to be scared of!”
“And I’m scared too.”
“Yes. But the situation is different than yours.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I don’t either. But I know what I saw. I saw your face. You know that? When I turned around and saw you lying there, and the light from the candle was shining on you. I saw your face.”
“You saw what?”
“I saw the fear in your eyes, Cristina. I saw the fear. I saw the fear that a person feels when he looks at the face of someone who could have just turned into a zombie. And I also saw the fear that a person feels when he’s about to be killed by a zombie.”
Jason pointed at the door. “Cristina, I don’t want to hurt you. I want to help you. I want to fix all of this. I am the one that can fix it. Please, come out and help me. Let’s stop this!”
“That’s why I’m under the covers, you maniac.”
“I know.”
“I’d come out for you if I could.”
Jason laughed.
“Maybe next time.”
“One time won’t do any good.”
“I just need a minute, and then we can fix this.”
“What can we do?”
“I don’t know.”
I felt Jason standing in front of the door, looking at me. He was gripping the door frame with both hands and leaning over it.
“How much do you want this, huh?”
“I don’t want this.”
“Then what are you here for?”
“I don’t know!”
“If you don’t want this, you don’t want anything.”
“You’re just a crazy guy!”
“Maybe I am. I don’t know what to do.”
“You should just go away.”
“How could I do that?”
“Go to bed.”
“I can’t sleep without you.”
“What do you want from me? What’s in it for me?”
“You don’t know?”
“No.”
“Just tell me what you want. Tell me, because you can’t hide anything from me, because I already know everything.”
“I don’t know. Something. I just want you. I want to be with you. I want to be your man. I don’t want to be alone.”
“Why won’t you come out, man? I can’t sleep, I need your help.”
“Help me?”
“Help me.”
“You are mad.”
“No, I’m not!”
“You want me to help you kill yourself.”
“No, I don’t.”
“I’m not stupid. I’m not blind. You want me to kill you, Cristina. You want me to feed you my human flesh.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“I saw you last night. You wanted me to feed you my human flesh.”
“You’re crazy.”
“No, I’m not. I’m just tired of seeing you in your pajamas.”
“You’re crazy.”
“I’m not crazy.”
“Oh, I know you are. I know you are.”
“I am not!”
“You are. You are totally crazy.”
“I am not crazy.”
“I know you are, Cristina. You are crazy.”
“You’re crazy.”
“No, I’m not. You are.”
“I am not crazy!”
“Yes, you are.”
“No, I’m not.”
“I can hear you breathing in your sleep.”
“I am not sleeping! You’re crazy!”
“You’re totally crazy.”
“What are you doing, here? You’re crazy.”
“No, I’m not.”
“You are, Cristina. You’re crazy.”
“I’m not crazy!”
“You are, Cristina. You’re crazy. You’re crazy.”
I heard the footsteps coming down the stairs. They were slowly and carefully walking down the stairs. They were at least 6 feet tall, if not more.
There was a creaking sound as they approached the door. I didn’t have to open the door to know who it was. I looked down at the floor and then back up. It was Jason. He had changed his clothes and put on a black tee shirt with a skull and crossbones on it and a pair of camo shorts. He was still wearing his tactical pants and boots, with two nightsticks that matched the tee shirt. He was still holding a small dagger, one of the weapons that he had brought with him. He had the rope in his hand, too. He didn’t look happy at all.
I opened the door and Jason stepped in.
“You did this.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I know everything. I saw you. I watched you. I watched you feed her your human flesh. I saw the look on her face. She was disgusted, but she liked it. I watched you fuck her, twice. You came twice in her. Then she woke up. She opened her eyes, and smiled at you. She looked you straight in the eye and said, ‘I liked it.’ You can’t deny it. She is mad.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m not crazy.”
“You are. You’re totally crazy.”
“I’m not crazy.”
“You are, Cristina. You’re crazy. You’re crazy.”
I backed up against the wall. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
:: 01.27.2021 ::
“Approve certification for settlement purposes on consent of the Parties;
and (2) approve Notice of Certification and Settlement Approval Hearing.”
So began the vetting. A devious device to sort out your friends and foes.
Was called the First Order of the Court!
Gavel pounding. Audience quieted.
“Now, we shall hear from our eminent Scientist!
A mister drewLow from the Highlands known as “Beyond’C!”
A very decript figure rose from the lower rafters and made crippled way
to the stage. A cup of water on the filament stem but he did not partake.
“My fellow Citizens of WereLingWorld!”
THE wereling world is infinitesimally smaller than any ‘human’ eye could
ever see. No. To see this world requires government technology — thank you
so kindly for your taxes! But we will not share what we created with your money.
Shit.
“I, after 858 years comes to you with findings of upmost importance! Not just
for WereLing World but for all of sentient beings in the GreaterTHANcanSee!
aT THAT very moment a shot of unobtainaium rang out and pierced the CordMust
from Doctor drewLow’s SoulRope.
:: 04.19.2022 ::
SLEEP awake. Sleep. Wake. Now _> tell me;
what is madness if not waking up to this same
day without a Savior: so gently hush
your eyes and fly with me (You see doctor:
‘WITHIN every dream my
heart takes the final steps
toward oblivion. With every beat-step I take takes
me much further from something we call Heaven.’
And when standards of living fall dizzy it’s only
a true force and we question is there a heaven?”
and as a madman I dream and say:
“I am the butterfly who moves mountains and hurricanes
I am chaos dripped in color on a journey by seven suns.”
So shut your precious eyes and sing and dream
“I, too, am an alien in human flesh
trying to feel human too…”
So we suffer! As children without parents.
:: 04.17.2022 ::
 | Damien de Soto on Could I Be |
 | EPRobles on Could I Be |
| Damien de Soto on Could I Be |
| Damien de Soto on Drowning in Fear |
 | romanticallyinclined… on A PECK OF KISSmOuth |
E.P. Robles | Poetry 
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