Tag Archives: #psychology

TRYING TO SPEAK THE UNSPEAKABLE

Is it a society of wicked liars?

Is it a race of contemptible malefactors?

Or is it, instead, just a group of people coming to terms with their lives in a different way?

A growing number of people are choosing to live—and die—without judgment, without the reward of popularity, without the flattery of public adulation.

Most people—without much fuss—are choosing to die quietly, often in comfort, not coughing up blood, losing organs, gasping for air. Rather, they do the things they like, they have their lovers, fall in love again. They experience as many experiences as possible. They have children, watch them grow up, let them out. They do the things they love. In fact, they do as much as possible.

Maybe they are only one of millions who will die this way, quietly, without much attention at all. But for those who read about the Swedish model, maybe they’ll read about this man who, when he was ten years old, decided to end his life when his family wouldn’t let him live the life he wanted to. Maybe they will read about one of the last people on the planet who were given the opportunity to kill themselves.

Maybe they will read about the first person.

Whether he knew it or not, it was Doran, the poet, who led us here. In 2020, when he was 36, he pulled his wife and a friend onto a commuter train in Paris. They sat at a table, drank wine, and ate wild boar with the train’s conductor.

After that, he had a drink with friends. By 2:

Then they all took colors all within their head. And they tried to say the unspeakable.

:: 10.21.2020 ::


WHEN THINGS SO EXPENSIVE ARE FOR FREE

IF you follow me bring the dead along for all the children have suffered and all
madmen pollute || ~~ IS GAME OVER “? between sun-beating down & STARS beating
psychotic clowns/ the pogo clown has died forever.
If you could you might adjust your eyes against all monsters that follow
…kiss me if you survive \\perishing is a buildingGRACE of reSKINNING the Soul
(oh whoa oh whoa oh wow oh no oh hey)
…just say the hardest price to pay //
are the things for free // eat and drink
remain my memory deeply between crimson &
sun-baked lips (music stretches thinner
e a c h & e v e r y d a y
carry on even if the stars extinguish
the very hurt you receive time &
space str e t c h ed pass a threshold of
mortal pain…you see and creation is reversed forward
God have mercy upon our weakened hearts
shame shame it’s the only world we have
and each other — there ain’t no denying (OH mother! No denying LIFE
is a THORN against my eyes; as i bend down i try to find my BEING
within a deeply yelled moan; i’m dying i’m dying i’m rolling round
a desert stream — shambalah come again against trail dust and kasmir
i am waiting i am decaying i am a mote of Poet
t r aveling inside OPEN space considered: static syntax
and congealed moments upon the professional grace of unspoken
words. whoa…whoa…it’s the hardest price to pay when things
so expensive are for free.

:: 03.03.2020 ::


YOU CHOKE UPON THE APRON STRINGS OF MISS CLEAVER

You choke upon the apron strings of miss cleaver and
wish you could have a piece of blue-laced sky on a plate
tasting the battery acid of your generation you wish to

die

it’s all for the praise of a god you dropped to the floor
all for the reasons you gave up for wishing you had taken

the gold plated door into your oblivion of consumer

products like a societal whore who begs for more

:: 11-02-2014 ::


BONE CAVE

HUMANS think the house
— the only haunt
As though the wood
conjures the Spirits
of other-worlds

But the mind has rooms
which lurks some evil
a cave of skull
— the dark anteroom
sometimes possessed…

Our stupidity in all
that life contains
Barely a morsel
a nibble at best
Hungry for life we be

Escape from there
to here we run
so busy are we, finishing
So leisurely
we wish it be!

:: 01-29-2014 ::


DESIRE

DESIRE pleases us
in many ways
the natural urge
— that compels
for many it must
be fastly quenched
or the magic
— loses its spell

My desire can never expire
it dwells within another place
— far from flesh and skin
between the fold
of existence
beyond the sight
of human eye

My desire — a burning fire
needs no explaining
it resides over there
— beyond the way
eccentric I am
some would say

:: 01-26-2014 ::


THE WALL

Today I faced
a wall in my way
but did not see
a barrier
Instead I saw
steadfast resolve

:: 00-00-0000 ::


PERCEPTION

PERCEPTION made its way
the grand entrance just today
it entered with a cloak
— barely if I may
while watching me
such eternal depth of sight
I felt a chilling choke
Aware was I of something
dark and ill from my senses
— I turned the other eye

::01-21-2014::


THE MASK

THE mask you see
gently just for thee
where once tender
fingers touched
and pale face
once adorn…
It has no eyes
save the ones
— of your soul
And if some tears
— it could shed
oceans it would fill
Such a love it has
for your porcelain skin

::01-21-2014::


MADMAN

I SAW a madman just today
in unison we waved
— across the way
Such a friend is he
his shadow fits
— so perfectly into me
And in the mirror
we smile together
and return to writing
upon a cloud of custard pie
— a sprinkling of words
and chocolate pudding

::01-21-2014::


PSYCHO-DRAMA

AND if you are repulsed
by my humanity
then clearly I say
you are  not
— meant for me

My sanity
— no latitude
for your brain-vessel
to navigate across
my ocean-emotions

Chart your course
away from my shores
and bidding farewell
— I do eagerly —
to the storms of your mind

::01-16-2014::