Tag Archives: #sad

Sad Cafe

It’s been so long
since I touched
the feeling of love.
I painted her face
on a sad canvas
in a cafe of lost love.
We knew that two hearts
were lost in pain,
like shipwrecked souls.
How it hurts when I saw
tears like swells;
oceans so lost at sea.
And I sent her my love
(all souls lost at sea).
It has been so long,
I couldn’t remember,
but I saw a wave crest
across my soul,
and she sent her love.
When she said,
“I’m a survivor lost
at sea, babe,”
I never wanted to
say goodbye.

:: 03.12.2023 Rev::


Love as One

Being born into Sin
for being born human
i lose my sight
so i cannot taste lies
and left my tongue alone

Leaving my legs
so i cannot talk
denying my ears
so i cannot hear
i forgot the pin
for my plastic card

oh no, hell no,
no wine, cigs or
chocolate bars

Before today there was
nothing but a zero
tomorrow is one
lets minus stupid
and regard love as One.

Love as One.

:: 11.08.2022 ::


Lacrimosa Always in Death

IF the END was a monsterous abyss and you imagined carried out corpses: the Ones passed who never
shed tears as they Never Fell Into an Abyss, do sing:

‘I love you and still living and having arrived unto Eternal Love’ then if you cry remember/
Grieving is only deep pain while i arise –what Looked Like an End is Just Sunset
as now dawn (the End), while the grave locked up, is when you are the prisoner of here — named
Human. Kind. As ever you have ever seen a new seed planted into the Earth –> called Human.

When the creation of words and souls made the quick foot –> that you Evie Loved, that Joy
we shared (defeat never, my shinning sword & steel, within your Eyes i Understood. That many of things we shared but never defeat my bold companion of love, tears, and silences. There! Only two, who speak to me; as i am their Father and they love me. My deathless courage
how then of them! And we three and my Son shall stand within the morning’s sun and we shall be dangerous!

Praise our God of Goodness and great faith
sister and brothers? Devoured now by fear and lust
of Self.

Look! Up! The Grace of Eternal Memory!

:: 10.09.2022 ::


ABBY THE MOST AMOUNT OF GOOD

ABBY, the most amount of good is not enough
~ BUT ~
i am more than a mouthpiece
I am above them,
the cold fingers of a lover
embrace me as you seek to trace the marks
in my body then follow my path of ruin
until my wounds are healed
but where once i rose, i grow
but i am never whole, never the same.
i will keep the air thick with grief
as you use your fingers to touch
your nose to mine until we are dust,
i will live on in our hearts,
until we meet again,
~ BUT ~
if we meet, you shall burn.
let me show you my people
they are beyond your understanding
but then so am I
~~ MY MOMENT OF JOY ~
i do not know how i survived the
thought of you my mind gone
my body taut and still,
blood pounding through my temples,
through my eyes, but
i do not feel alone,
i hear a soft breath and see
a beautiful little girl
in the blue of the sky.
i am moving.
i move a hundred times
a second i move once
a thousand, louder than thunder
the tempest of blood that threatens to drown me,
i move once again and it is done
a tree appears and i sink into it
then i am passing through the sky
i feel wind on my face
i see her smile
i know that there is
no fate to defeat me
she will guide me
then she will love me
until her breath is my breath
and we are only we

~

~~ IMAGINATIONS OF FROZEN FEVER ~
i am dreaming
i am wishing
i am seeing things that do not exist
~ i DO NOT
EVER EXPECT YOU TO BE THE LAST ONE
who reaches out
EVER TO HIS HOSTS IN THE DARK
I DO NOT EVER EXAGGERATE
THE IMAGE EVER
TRUE
FREEDOM IS NOT FREE OF LIFE
and I WAS ALWAYS FREE.

more than you know

The creature that comes to you and binds your life to your dreams
the night-horrors that rule your beasts, or shall i cower and die?
I came to you to surrender but then you gave your heart to another
now my words are useless and i see the dead walking
and in your eyes there is only a false light
i am so confused, let me be with you i am free
your blood has become my food and so i fade away,
so that you can remain never forget to forget
never forgive those who forget you will never be forgotten

~ BUT ~

the things i tell you, my visions, my words,
your flesh they stay with you
until your eyes no longer see
when i am but a wind-mote blown off the tip of your hair
and so when you cry and your heart breaks you cannot
let me go
my bones lay on your soul for all the life that you are
i am the shadow that never leaves you

the whisper of my sigh!

:: 04.03.2022 ::


TOME (dangerous friends inside one’s head)

ATE a memory of all my life & despised my refrain: how soil  and seed brings life or death
 your back turned (i feel blessed)  deciding style and finance
 were your gods so eat what you sow  & throw away wheat &  golden strands of souls

If inside mysterious feelings
you feel stupid and contagious
it’s best to feel a little sick
  and always will do oh do
 until  End / hello \ hell no |
Inside light sounds dangerous voices and touches vicious
 :a baby a fetus –| we tend to forget what makes us smile inside
our horrored MINDS.  Hell oh hell oh hello WAS a mysterious tasting of
stupid feelings worth the pain?
    worse or worst is all a gift even though Life must be better
   before it all Ends.

:: 12.17.2021 ::


AZURE SKIES

Azure sunsets and once again
empty skies — that she’s gone
i stay so i see sun and skies
eat hope

there’s a small dot inside my heart
it’s as yesterday — the same old
thing as a cat caught in a high
tree top // and inside this rain
i turn around inside my brain \\
so easy to be a madness as
the symphony sings.

As half of migratory birds
Round over another half of volcano
birds by beauty deafens them
Wearing red and pinks of women’s charms
makes them follow the appearance of their echo
as an echo becomes unknown — before you.

The personal echo is wide of fiery blaze
AS A carriage of birds flees all land
The defending carriage AND SISTER MOON —
its live passengers.

Silver Passengers TOO: how you go to a
difference of dawn without permission!

As an actress of extreme weather and
surprising nectar of warm and loose dreams
Legs as if they speak in her two herself
And she responds to herself as she runs herself

How you can fly as an invisible island.

The full moon and the empty sun of night
which we see sleeping spinning corrupting
the ocean of soothing dreams.

SHE makes her deal among the dreaming victims.

Fire death
Fire that makes hate useless

The dream by simplicity of love.
And how your Love flows through me.

I burn for you.

:: 08.31.2021 ::


THE VORTEX OF LIFE

AND what is a friendship without warm feelings and devotion?
As those who go to and fro from bed to work without
a gentle smile or hello!
I would share a drink with you but first i must be sure
the label is not high alcohol but a label that reads either:
“life,” or “death.”
As the sun dips behind Mother Earth we eat and clean ourselves
then ready for bed. We read, watch something on the magic box
called television or stare at the walls. Some dream, some smoke,
some drink, some fight. Who is mad? All of us! Call it what you like
but the moral of that is — ‘Oh, ’tis love, ’tis love, that makes
the world goes round!’

Our human intentions only make matters worse!

Then the turtle spoke: “Those lovers we read about: to all the characters
drawing in colourful lines… you keep emotions at an anchor deep inside so
you can move far above the bubbles’ tricks — but the people swimming in
fish-glasses are freaked out. So many lives spilled, even all living simple
souls, cannot sustain the waters of love.

:: 04.22.2021 ::


POETIC PAINTINGS

SHE would pull back her hands to her sides, her furrows bear poetic paintings with a past unfolded in crosshatch, reprimands to the unblinking, to the untried to never covet an hour lost and found, the length of a sunset, a sun weighing us down, now or then looking away to a beach that doesn’t seem our way, reputed for its unchanging coral reefs and saying it’s way more glorious than the beach next door, as we know, the one nobody cares to swim into.

Then my hips, already weak, begin to shake though when you come with me, if we should go by car, we’re together, on ground heavy that your steps cannot change.

I must say more, but you know the story. You must hear the secret though only the Sages were allowed to hear it.

It is a light; my dark world turns into a coffin light, the whole thing collapsing, if i miss you, my sadness begs, but there are no answers what to do when everything in you, in all of us weeps for absence.

Better for the room’s overhead to be darkness, for me, for my heart’s an end that must not bend, a blade lost in sand. Can no healing be between our two lonely hearts without me weeping and no consolation
without you wanting to know, when we’ll fall in love again?

Want to buy a song give a gift of musical genius the way we never stop loving, until I can be safe again.

I’ve lived alone for the last thirteen years, still living off my memories of her, but having no contact with her — except for my last few days, of course.

I wrote the only song I can sing now, and there were no lessons to be had in any language even if you had known about me, about how I suffered in my anger, from the depth of my despair,
you would not have come near.

:: 03.26.2021 ::


L I S T E N

Listen. Today i lost my voice — it left upward looking for my mind.
sometimes the strangeness of Life becomes reality and nothing more.
today i found myself within a garden of snakes and meat-devouring
plants. If not for the purple skies it would have been a wasted
experience. Meeting God was an experience before i found myself
inside a fetus that became my physical body.
the doves sang a brilliant but sometimes somber song;
peace of a piece so small it became nothing before i could
touch it’s sharp and exquisite edge.
Listen.
Today i lost my mind.
and my voice flew downward looking for sanity.

:: 09.11.2020 ::


TO BE SO SAD

TO be so sad that your tears
flee you is the greatest depth
of sadness.

the perfect point to hit upon the
diamond:  shaving off all humanity
and anyone else…
     whoever gave
a damn is not anyone
i ever knew and that tears me apart.
breaks my heart.

I watch from the tiny window of my
decaying Soul.  

::: 08.02.2020 ::