Monthly Archives: June 2018

Sometimes & Only a Few Times

Sometimes and only a few times (this week) the tears just leak and fall everywhere I am.

My head does not have a heart and my heart does not have a mind ~ do you ever wonder
if others are afflicted, too?            By this bizarre physiological aliment called sensitivity.
[this morning my air mattressed — regretting that allowing my weight to burden
-it has a leak too, you see i sold my real bed and the women who had once
sleepy-hungryTime’d with me there)

AND; (thank you) I dug that hole over there by that imaginary oak tree which sits
beneath a bruised blue languishingly beautiful cloud;

within i have placed everything i am.
Last night by the full moon and my secret (but I shall only tell you) friend. She is
the ball of bountiful light and alive and hums in vibrant tones and she is now our
private secret
we covered the box with mother earth’s blessings and slept there. Growth is
2 parts terror and 3/4th’s pain //wishing it was never a scream that awoke me but
a tender kissed wish-made true )( winds are that thing
you feel when you lose a NothingMatteredAnyWho-thing.

And those boxed deeds me, my friend (and you Now…now now) planted have grown into
every shapedGhostBreathing debt-turned-gold.

The s p a c e s b e t w e e n w o r d s a r e t h e t r u e
m e s s a g es w a i t i n g t o b e e x p r e s s e d /i love you.

:: 06-30-2018 ::


Gonzo Poetry

I had run out of it i’m out of it
mind you my mind that ran away
first by feet then by train
paxil was her name a rotundish
hard skinned pink pill of a pimp
so sleeping a tossing flipping
dreaming dream i witnessed a mess
messing up a dream:

this slot of sliced land jutting
with clapboard housing a shouting
with roaches a toasting the best
of a meal they boasted
the strangest of stranglets in
a land of stranger piglets;

two step eddie backed up to a window
owned by a rider, says he with
back to a drive-thru widow, ‘take
this shotgun, won’t need it, take
this broad sword too, and take this
forty-four again won’t need it,
i’ll keep this grenade cause it
needs me more — see that man there
, snagged my lawn cutting his own
, watch me walk over there.

Two-step walks over there and pulls
the pin and once again they do like
they do the owner of that window
was a copy-cop over 44 and says
to eddie, ‘don’t pull that pin you
sons of guns, sons of burning suns!”
Pin pulled, trigger pressed two slugs
in the valley of the deepest cracks
of two buns and all is done.

And the female dog under the oak
toking-tree says to her male friend,
‘your banging will wake up the
recently dead if you don’t stop
banging and start more slapping instead;
no-step eddie tells the devil he
needs to brush his tooth but forgot
his teeth brush under the bush.

Never cold turkey Paroxetine
and slip to sleep on a Monday.

:: 06-26-2018 ::


The Flowers Inside of Me

I couild allow the night
to smother me
but what’ll I do
in the morning?
(you’ll see)

But I’ll keep the flower
within me
the flower
within me

Now and then it’s a struggle
to see, now now
Now I sometimes
just don’t know
then I’ll see a morning’s
sunrise so brilliant
and see
and away
all the pain
so I keep caring for
caring for the flower within me

It’s what I do but it may be wrong
whether rain or sunshine
it’s all nuturing
like all of life ~

So I keep the flower,
I keep the flowers
alive inside of me
all inside of me

:: 06-23-2018 ::


WITHIN THIS SLICE OF BLEAKMOMENT


DELICIOUSLIFE HOVERS


Beautiful Dream

A beautiful dream last night while i was walking overTHERE.
My name was unknown to me and my feet had a small inkling
of where they had traveled within my past.

It was blissful.

i walked into a white marbled room that contained a bench
made of unfulfilled wishes; the ceiling gently weeping
the softest tears of love toward me. My soul was drenched
in hope.

On the wall in front of me was a most beautiful painting
framed within amethyst and the colors were otherworldly
and breathtaking.

Upon waking i went to my easel and picked up my brush
but soon realized our world does not possess such colors
and even if so there is not a single soul that could
comprehend that angelic spectrum of a higher rainbow.

I wish to sleep.

Again.

:: 06-01-2018 ::


Gravity ii

Last night gravity broke down and today
my toilet refuses to acknowledge a
fundamental rule: the push of God’s gaze
should make the toilet water flush away
all of my worse fears and physical
burdens.

It hasn’t and likely will never.

Lifting the cosmic lid and adjusting
the lever of proposition gives me
some hope — gravity apparently
has a terrible temperment when shit
tries to float down hill.

:: 06-01-2018 ::


The Forever Now

scream your thoughts
into the void
and bring some flowers
crowned in thorns
and hold your thoughts
for the parade
of sad mannequins
they all limp forward
toward the grave

and all i know
and all i pray
and all i see

is a forever now

and all i taste
and all i feel
and all i do

is live forever now

and the weight of flesh
is best held in contempt
and the worst of us
is the best of all
and it’s always been
so it always will be
and to taste a smile
is the flavor of life

so pray so beg so needed
and today of all days
is the forever now
the forever now
forever now
now.

:: 06-01-2018 ::