HOLES INSIDE MY HEAD

HOLES inside my life i scream words that never heal
echoes against head and solid rock is how i fall
confusing what is real and how i burn inside

A feeling so innocuous consumes me
i find myself inside another cedar box of
insecurity — crawling inside skin
fearing how i feel and how without confidence
never shows my reflection against the tears you
shed –> so denied by life and love
feeling how i react to discomfort
so close to the edge maybe i should break
the creative walls i created closing against
this will i stood by /collapsing walls
over and over like before \
everyone saying stay safe : even if you’re not
with me i am with you — how i see it /i fell
toward the floor by a bullet | it’s how i
felt promised by your angelic face and your voice
— even if you’re not with me I’m with you.

it’s the end of December and forever new years.
apart and part of how i pushed it all away/
how to give it all away is a simple thought.
It’s my last December of snow covered trees.

:: 01.01.2022 ::