The beach sloped up to a harbour. A girl held a towel over a palm tree, gripping the wrist-let for balance.

Why climb up? she said.

The sea widened out, five hundred yards at least, silvered sheets, colder here, a bay with a tide ebb.

A harbour of crabsteaks bulked dark, frozen corpses. She shook her towel, a wave lifted her breasts, the air was sour with her floral perfume. Jugglers’ parakeets made their fruity larking noises.

Jesus: their wings sound like voices. The red post of an outpost shone like a second moon.

By the harbour, at the point where land touched sea, a wrecked car, roof smashed down.

It had not sunk, but hung almost horizontal. Some air car, but no sign of the driver. An arm splashed up, spidery from lobster bites. Scuba gear: if only they had a boat. The girl was running to the wreck.

It looked as if it had taken out the sea wall, fifty yards inland. The cliff kept the sea at bay.

A man was leaping across the wrecked car.

A child followed. What was he doing?

:: 03.07.2022 ::

Rubrikain!

My chest tightens as I find myself without an umbrella. The wind in my face is refreshing.

My hands are cold and I’m holding them on my chest as if I’m desperately trying to draw more air into them.

I feel the rain on my cheek, and I keep my head up, but it’s only sprinkling. My backpack is gone; I was too distracted by my friend’s thick voice to pay attention. With each downpour I walk more closely with the trees and the rain keeps falling. There’s an unearthly glow around me, much like the gash I made in the sky. The air is thick, and my body seems to move in slow motion. I keep getting closer to the storm.  As I approach the beach I realize I don’t have an umbrella, which is okay since I don’t have any friends.  I see the rows of umbrellas attached to random people who are in such a hurry to get where they’re going that they don’t realize that a hurricane has hit. As I stand next to them I realize how utterly alone I am in my life. I am nothing without you. I feel helpless, like I am in this storm alone. I stand next to you until you finally notice me and look over at me. The rain is falling harder, and I see the ground is beginning to swell.

You ask me what I’m doing, but before I can answer you step back and turn your back to me.

After a few seconds, you turn to me again, but this time your face is tear-stained. You open your arms for a hug, and I walk into them. The world around us, while still extremely wet, stops moving. I’m in your arms as the water floods through our t-shirts and seeps into our skin. It’s cold, but we stay in the puddle, arms wrapped around each other, until the storm ends. We break away from the hug and look at each other in the ocean of tears that were once covering your face. You smile and lean in to kiss my forehead. You smile and tell me I should have asked if I could come with you. Your embrace was everything I could ever hope for. There are no other words to describe it.

Oh Rubrikain!

I kiss your forehead. It’s a goodbye kiss. You open your eyes and smile. You make a big gulping noise, and throw yourself into the ocean. The water covers me and I begin to sink with you into the abyss. I hope that you’ll find your way back to me. Follow/

You open your arms for a hug, and I walk into them. The world around us, while still extremely wet, I knew.

:: 03.05.2022 ::\

my winter becomes
the warmer of me
when i walk beyond
the ice and crust
of broken life-dreams
and i visit them
the silky ones
who fell between
my grasping means
weakling fingers

i confess my secret;
it is me and not they
who haunt the day

i am their purgatory
wishing, thinking,
a belief in now

I haunt the ghosts
and they fear me!

:: 10-04-2014 ::