Category Archives: #despair

I ASKED THE VAST UNKNOWN

i asked the vast unknown if it knew
me___a taste of dirt i spat; an unraveling became
of me as though falling into and through a rabbit’s hole.
but One outside of space &
time — where nothing Human
is said, worn or told: again unraveling into a deeper sense
of nonsense whom once i was be-
came nothing More.

Is what this is more:

More, so much more!

:: 05.13.2020 ::


TASTING SPACELESS

TOO TASTE SPACELESS NOW

purple heart hazelnut eyes
a beautiful world
& how they all crawl
upon your skin: a nuclear
field /so i have never had
that much time…, feeling
brain-traffic as you fly
back into space-time; sweet
naughty girl my Emily D.

:: 05.03.2020 ::


HYPNOTIZED LIFE

i can take Life upon my chin
i can take it upon my head
although it makes me sad
when i have to see it all
within my eyes i don’t see
a polite way to make this call
/oh wishing i first had
a vision\for a poor humble
wide-opened poet/ of no age or
time and then of no-more
\life is living while you’re bleeding
each day of Life is closer to Death
oh boy.

:: 03.23.2020 ::


DYING MEat

We’re dying meat all inside
unexpressed confessions so,
kill me /dark deep dive
all for your pleasure re-
gardless of type of weather:
we guard your dying MEat
always dying for your meat’s
car-crash weather/we live or
die is not a question for any
Soul\

:: 03.22.2020 ::


GHOST-FLESH

FORGOTTEN! are the fragmented memories as
touching the ghost-flesh of a missing limb ;a
bridge too far spanned beyond measure
and torn-bleeding feet bared for all to
witness/my Sweetest days
were alone with you
my brilliant Sun and her mistress of night
with silver-beamed light from her ageless face
the Moon\my Love is immeasurable, my Love’s
passion unmeasurable — we are too busy with
each other’s joy to notice; her nails are black
her neck is thin, her eyes anthracine-misty;
the very air within her presence a maelstrom
of mystery is where i am is where i go.

:: 03.21.2020 ::


FORTITUDE

Madness has found it’s circus again.
What? – Panic.
It is where fear holds hands with
weakness.

To watch how the world changes,
as though it has never had wings
And the enemy is full of nothingness
but it’s shadow is cast across
the mind’s of those without Faith.

To allow the Sun to shine down
revealing all the Beings who Sleep
Nature’s keen sight — no thing
hidden but all revealed.

Since the world has stopped
Since the music has stopped
Since the traffic has stopped

The world is alone / inside itself
that no one says it the Skies Scream
“orietur! orietur!”
the words come alive! Alive!

:: 03.15.2020 ::


EARTHWORM

FATIGUED and humbled
are the moments
like stretched-broken
dreams of bottomless
desire // call me never
—desired by no one
My name : emptiness
. Nickname: ruinous.
The earthworm needs me.
Evil curses my tolerance.
The world absolutely
B R O K E N. \\

:: 10-05-2018 ::


A POET

i met a poet just today

he greeted me with much

laughter as foreplay

(we seized each other

from brim to toe)

one cried the other sang

a hymn

and at the end we shook

our head contemplating

which the queerer

and stepped away

from our mirror.

:: 09-12-2018 ::


FLAT SHADOWS

i birthed one of my famous dreams
last night and invited the
whole town. every inconsiderate
thought came and the flat shadows
of my dearest fears.
the Child with no face on the sidewalk
outlines in broad strokes
Despair. a piece of dove of peace
smothered in regrets on a wooden table
served on a terrace of blinding terror.
only the smallest of facts carry
the greatest stories of which this one
is condemned to 3 o’clock each mourning.
before heaven awakens.
before sizzling strains
of gravity prove awakened
minds are too heavy.
as the rest of the town hides everywhere
that sanity has escaped i press
hard into my eyes by thumbs to forget.
manifested dreams is a sidecar
of my mental vehicle. again at sunrise
to find that one last star yet devoured
by daylight. a wish upon that remaining
survivor — allow this to be me!

:: 09-10-2018 ::


A DOOR PAINTED BLACK

i have a dry heart without color
— and watch me go.
i am the begger on the street
begging for a soul,
watching how beautiful people go.
i see a row of living flowers
all colors but never turning black.
i see how your sundress flows,
and i see a line of lovers
some turn their heads.
i am always besides myself
waiting for you through the door
watching the doornob turn.
i say my lungs are blue and if I
open my eyes what shall i see.
I see a door so painted black
and wish you’d turn your head
and listen to the words of my soul.
a heart so full of colors and flowers
that will never turn black,
looking inside myself i see ribs
that shall never turn black
facing facts — i see a bluejay too
looking for her nest and my love
laughs with me and I see a black door
with no doorknob and see how love goes
by and I still turn my head
wishing love to visit my soul

uh huh hmm…uh huh hmm…turning black
she turns her head and fills my
darkest black //

:: 10142015 ::